Armin van Buuren reveals the emotional toll of becoming a star: “I have missed too many moments with my family.”

Armin van Buuren is one of the most celebrated names in the world of electronic dance music (EDM). With a career that spans more than two decades, hundreds of international shows, chart-topping tracks, and an army of loyal fans, his success story is the kind many aspiring artists only dream of. But behind the bright lights and epic stage productions lies a more personal story—one that speaks to the emotional cost of fame, relentless touring, and years spent away from loved ones. In a rare and heartfelt interview, Armin van Buuren opened up about the emotional toll of becoming a global star, revealing that his success has come at the expense of valuable moments with his family.

The Price of Global Stardom in the EDM Scene

Armin van Buuren’s journey to the top of the EDM hierarchy has been nothing short of extraordinary. From founding the iconic “A State of Trance” radio show to headlining the world’s biggest festivals like Tomorrowland, Ultra Music Festival, and EDC, Armin has continuously pushed the boundaries of live performance and studio production. However, as he candidly admitted, that level of global stardom doesn’t come without sacrifices. In his own words: “There’s a heavy emotional cost to this life. You think you’re doing it all for the love of music, and you are—but at the same time, you’re missing out on birthdays, first days of school, and quiet family dinners.” The DJ lifestyle might seem glamorous, but the constant traveling, rehearsals, and commitments leave very little time for anything else. For Armin, whose children are growing up while he plays night after night on the other side of the planet, this is more than just a fleeting regret—it’s a deep emotional wound.

Balancing Family Life and a Demanding Career

One of the most striking admissions from Armin was about the challenge of balancing family life and career. For many fans, seeing Armin on stage represents euphoria and release—but for Armin, it’s often a complex emotional exchange. “It’s a strange contradiction. I’m giving my all to the audience, but inside, I sometimes feel empty because I know I’m not at home with my wife and kids,” he said. Armin’s wife, Erika van Thiel, has long been known for her support behind the scenes. The couple shares two children and have tried to maintain a stable home despite his whirlwind schedule. Yet, even with that support system, Armin admits that things aren’t always easy. “There are nights where I call home before going on stage, and my daughter is crying because I’m not there to read her a bedtime story. And then I have to go out and play for 50,000 people like everything is fine.” His words highlight a truth that many touring musicians face: emotional compartmentalization. The challenge of being present emotionally, even when physically absent, can take a toll not only on the artist but also on their family members. The missed milestones—school plays, anniversaries, holidays—can quietly build into a mountain of regret.

The Psychological Toll of Touring and Performing

The world of electronic music has often glamorized constant touring as a symbol of success. However, Armin van Buuren’s reflection shines a light on the psychological toll this lifestyle can inflict. With a tour schedule that often spans over 150 shows a year, including international travel, rehearsals, soundchecks, and promotional events, the physical and mental exhaustion is real. “It’s not just jet lag or missing home,” Armin explained. “It’s the emotional drain of being ‘on’ all the time—smiling, performing, giving your energy to people, when inside, you’re running on empty.” While the energy from fans often fuels artists in the short term, the long-term effects of such a pace can be brutal. The result is a cycle of burnout that many in the industry face but few talk openly about. Armin, however, has been one of the few EDM icons willing to address it candidly. In recent years, he has even spoken at mental health forums and music industry panels, urging younger artists to prioritize well-being over relentless success. “Fame can be addictive, and success is intoxicating,” he said. “But no award or sold-out arena is worth your mental health or your relationship with your children.”

Redefining Success in the Later Stage of His Career

At 47, Armin van Buuren is no longer the fresh-faced trance prodigy he once was—but that’s not a bad thing. In fact, age and experience have given him a new perspective on what success in the music industry truly means. “When I was younger, I thought success was about being number one on DJ Mag’s Top 100. Now, success for me is being able to spend the weekend at home with my kids and still have a crowd singing along to my tracks next month.” This shift in mindset has prompted Armin to make significant changes. In 2024, he made the decision to reduce his touring schedule, allowing for longer stretches at home in the Netherlands. He’s also transitioned into mentoring emerging artists, offering production workshops, and spending more time in the studio rather than the stage. Fans have noticed the change, too. While Armin’s presence at mega-festivals has become more selective, the emotional depth and maturity in his recent music have only grown. Tracks like “Feel Again” and “Lose This Feeling” reflect themes of introspection, vulnerability, and human connection—emotions that resonate deeply with both new listeners and longtime fans.

The Role of Family in Shaping Armin’s Music

One of the most powerful aspects of Armin’s journey has been how his family continues to shape his music. Whether it’s the voice notes from his children that have occasionally been sampled in his tracks or the subtle lyrical nods to fatherhood and love, Armin has begun to merge his personal and professional worlds more openly. “I used to separate my personal life and my music entirely,” he shared. “Now I find that the more honest I am with my music, the more it connects with people.” His wife Erika has long been a grounding presence, often helping Armin find balance between ambition and peace. And while his children may not fully understand the magnitude of their father’s career yet, they are becoming more involved in small, meaningful ways. “Sometimes they help me pick the melodies,” he said with a laugh. “Or they’ll dance around the living room when I play new demos. That’s more valuable to me than any platinum plaque.”

A Cautionary Message to Young Artists in the EDM World

With all his accomplishments, Armin van Buuren is now in a unique position to offer wisdom to rising EDM artists. His journey from bedroom producer to international icon is inspiring, but he is also determined to warn others about the hidden costs. “I don’t want to discourage ambition,” he explained. “But I do want younger DJs and producers to understand that you can’t chase fame endlessly without losing something.” In industry conferences and podcast appearances, Armin has urged young artists to build strong support systems, seek therapy if needed, and avoid measuring their worth solely by chart rankings or Instagram likes. “You’re more than the brand. You’re a person. And people need rest, love, and connection. Don’t lose that chasing the spotlight.” This message is especially relevant in an era where burnout and mental health issues are increasingly recognized within the music industry. Armin’s voice adds weight to this conversation and challenges the narrative that endless hustle is the only path to success.

Looking Ahead: What the Future Holds for Armin van Buuren

As he looks toward the next chapter in his life and career, Armin van Buuren seems more grounded than ever. He continues to produce music, work with emerging talent, and headline select events that align with his new priorities. But more importantly, he is committed to creating a life that nurtures both his passion for music and his love for family. “I’m not done,” he said with a smile. “But I’m doing it on my terms now.” Fans can expect more deeply personal projects, fewer but more meaningful performances, and possibly even collaborative works with artists who share his introspective approach. Whatever comes next, one thing is clear—Armin van Buuren is no longer just chasing the beat. He’s chasing balance, healing, and authenticity.